Moving from Florida to New York: 1-Month Update
Today marks one month in the city I’ve always loved. And man has it taught me a lot: about myself, about others, and about the world as a whole.
On my first Tuesday here, a girl at the bar gave me this advice: don’t let the city turn you hard. I took it with a grain of salt because, of course, I wouldn’t let NYC harden my genuine and fun personality.
But she was onto something. Because when everyone is telling you to watch your back and mind your business, it’s hard to live with compassion or kindness.
I was denying people swipes, ignoring questions on transit, and giving absolutely no one the benefit of the doubt. And New York set me straight right away…
In the last month, I’ve been:
Stood up on a date – actually, I was unmatched while I was on the way!!
Lost two metro cards (one with $20 and the other with $5)
Gotten a fare evasion ticket
Stood in the rain and lightning waiting for a bus — only after running several blocks in the wrong direction
Missed more buses and trains than I can count
Been scammed out of a few dollars here and there by street vendors
But you know what? It’s not so bad because it taught me much more than I could expect.
7 lessons I’ve learned by moving to New York:
1. Keep an eye on your belongings
The same girl I met on Taco Tuesday also warned me never to let people watch my stuff (after I asked her to watch my purse while I was in the bathroom — hello!). Most people are kind, but others can be nefarious. And you never want to regret leaving your bag for even a minute.
Additionally, pick a spot for your MetroCard and put it back. Every. Single. Time. It doesn’t matter if you need a minute to get situated or will need to pull it out again two stops later. Just put it back.
2. Go out of your way to do the right thing
So often, the universe rewards goodness, so it’s best to be kind. $2.75 spent on another person isn’t so bad, so if someone asks you for a swipe (most likely to avoid a fare evasion ticket), try to give them one.
And some days, jumping the turnstiles or hopping onto the bus without paying will feel easier than refilling your MetroCard or going over to the ticket kiosk. Still, I’m telling you from experience, if you have the money, just do it. A $100 fare evasion will surely ruin your day.
3. Leave an hour earlier, especially on the weekends
The MTA is unreliable. Bus times change, detours happen, and sometimes your ride just won’t show up. Adding some extra buffer time will be a life-saver, lest you become the girl that’s always late.
Apple maps can be super helpful in getting directions. However, I also recommend downloading the green transit app. It gives you real-time updates on the different buses and trains nearby.
4. Do not trust these men, but we already knew that…
We’ve all heard the dating horror stories — of being stood up, set up, or worse. Stay mindful when dating in NYC (or anywhere else for that matter). Always meet in a public place, share your location with a friend, and take down as much information about your date as you can before you meet (not in a creepy way though).
It’s up to you if you want to go home with your date on the first night. But I suggest feeling it out and waiting until at least the second hang-out. You’ll be surprised how many guys also just unmatch you when you set the boundary that you’re not going to hook up with them.
5. Carry Cash
Cash is your best friend and greatest budgeting tool in New York. It allows you to stay mindful of how much you’re spending on any given night (which will be a lot).
Some places will waive tax and other fees if you pay in cash. Not to mention, there can be an upcharge for credit/debit, depending on the establishment. And don’t get me started on the price minimums.
Plus, it’s harder to be scammed.
6. You do NOT have to go out every day
In my first few weeks here, I was out all the time. I was pressuring myself to create and jump right into the New York aesthetic, sipping cosmos at happy hour with the girls. But my bank account soon caught up with me. And I can’t even begin to explain how exhausted I was — this city literally does not sleep. (But trust, I will be.)
It’s okay to live a regular life — at the gym, cooking at home, and just being — even though you moved to a new city. I’d argue that you should take this time to get your footing. I’m learning this lesson slowly. During June, I’ve been trying to spend my weekdays in the Bronx, and stomp the streets all day and all night on the weekends.
It’s about ✨ balance ✨. You’re not competing with anybody, after all.
7. Try to Stay Kind
When weird things started happening to me consistently, I had to take inventory of myself — of the type of person I was and how the universe was treating me because of it. I’ve tried to start living with intention and kindness (while still being cautious).
How much money do you need to survive in New York?
Okay, so this is the question I googled the most before I moved. Every source said upwards of 80K, but I’ve always wondered how the majority of people would make that here. We all know the trope of the struggling artist working at the coffee shop or retail store. And after applying to a few city jobs, it’s become even clearer that they’re not just trying to pay that off the bat.
Of course, you do have to make a pretty penny, but it’s possible to survive on less, especially if you’re savvy. There are tons of happy hours, free concerts/movies in the park, and affordable parties (follow the DJs) to keep you entertained on a budget.
There’s even a reduced fare program that cuts your transportation costs in half.
Is it worth it to move to New York?
If you’re considering moving to NYC, you’re going to come across a lot of naysayers. New Yorkers who have watched the city get progressively worse and can’t imagine why you’d move here. But you and I both know there’s still so much magic in this city.
And I’ve already been lucky enough to experience it first hand:
I got my meal for free because the truck was cash only, and who was supposed to know that?
The express bus driver let my friend and me on even though our cards didn’t have enough money.
I almost immediately met a friend, and we snuck into a wristband-only event.
Connected with even more people at every place I’ve gone solo
My date tried to give a lost teenager directions (I still think it was a ruse tbh).
Overall, there are more markets than you can count, and the vibes are incredible. Walking through Central Park on the weekend and seeing diverse friend groups picnicking and playing is seriously so pure and beautiful.
In the end, you can read every article in the world and watch all the TikToks and YouTube videos, but the only way to really know is to take the leap and do it. Because while I prepared for a lot of things, there was no way I could prepare for the nuances in the cracks, crevices, and alleys of this beautiful, dirty, lively city.
I don’t know if it’s forever, but I do know it’s for now — and that’s okay with me.